Humour Cafe

New Year is the time to unfold new horizons & realize new dreams, to rediscover the strength & faith within u, to rejoice in simple pleasures & gear up 4 a new challenges. Wishin u a truly fulfilling 2012

The Palm website is seen on the Palm Pre smartphone at the annual Consumer Electronics Show (CES) in Las Vegas, Nevada January 8, 2009. Palm Inc took the wraps off its overhauled mobile operating system and introduced the Pre touch-screen phone, hoping the move can help it win back customers from rivals like Nokia and Apple. Shares of Palm jumped more than 15 percent to $3.80 on the news.

One is the smallest man in the world, the other is the woman with the longest legs and the instructions from the former to the latter when they met this morning: 'Don't look up.'

At just 29.37in tall, He Ping Ping's little head barely reaches Svetlana Pankrtova's knees.

But then, her legs do go on a fair way - measuring 51.96in long.

There will be no need for a slow-motion replay to confirm this record-breaking feat.

Schoolgirl Tiana Walton has slithered into the record books - for having the most snails on her face at once.

Nine-year-old Tiana, who loves animals, bravely allowed 25 of the slimy creatures to cover her eyes, nose and mouth.

It may look like it was made from a Lego Meccano kit, but this 'Concept Ice Vehicle' from Lotus is built to withstand temperatures as low as -72C, travel up to 84mph and still be kind to the environment.

The innovative ice buggy, which will be used in a bid to trek 3,000 miles across Antarctica, runs on biofuel. The adapted supercharged BMW 1150 motorcycle engine gives off around 70 per cent less greenhouse emissions compared with ordinary petrol.

This bundle of blubber may only be 11 months old, but he is already the size of an eight-year-old.

The giant baby tips the scales at a whopping 61lbs 12oz (28kg) and stands four and a half stone larger than his older brother. Due to his hefty frame the toddler also has to wear huge nappies.

His mother, Milena Orosco de Agudelo, said her son started ballooning at just two months old.

he streamlined Mazda concept car was shown at the Auto China 2008 show. Jackie Chan added Hollywood glamour to the event.
A model poses beside the Bugatti Veyron 16.4 which is the most expensive sports car in the world.
The Nissan Pivo2 resembles a bubble. But how do you wipe the windscreen?
A woman wipes a Gwkulla, a battery-powered Chinese made Great Wall vehicle.
The silver Mazda is a far cry from the version you'll find in your local dealership.
The flame coloured Dodge Zeo Li-Ion Electric is displayed at the show in Beijing.

They may look like splashes of colourful paint, but these pictures were actually taken by the Hubble space telescope of a galaxy 235 million light years from Earth.

Scientists at Cambridge University say the spectacular images will help them to unravel a 30-year-old space mystery.

They are the first-ever detailed images of 'filaments' - delicate threads of gas that emerge from the centre of a distant elliptical galaxy called NGC 1275.
These images from Hubble have allowed researchers to observe the filamentary structure in unprecedented detail

Each thread has around one million times the mass of our own Sun. The structures are only 200 light-years wide, often surprisingly straight, and extend for up to 20,000 light-years.

Astronomers have long puzzled over how these fragile, 100-million-year-old structures have survived the rigours of space, but were unable to see them clearly enough to carry out effective research.

Dr Carolin Crawford, one of the authors of a report published in Nature today, said: ‘The images we got from the ground were always clouded by the Earth's atmosphere.

‘The new ones from the Hubble are crystal clear, and we've been able to take accurate measurements and study the composition of the filaments.
For years astronomers have puzzled over how these beautiful structures have survived

‘If something is very thin then they are inherently very fragile. What we are now learning is exactly how fragile, and how strong a magnetic force is required to support them.’

The filaments reach out from their home galaxy into the Perseus Cluster - described as a 'hostile, high-energy environment with a strong, tidal pull of gravity at its core'.

These combined forces should have ripped apart the filaments in a very short period of time, causing them to collapse into stars. Instead, they have withstood their inhospitable climes for more than 100 million years.

Using the new data, the Cambridge research team has been able to demonstrate that the strong magnetic fields in the region give the filaments a skeletal structure which is strong enough to prevent them from collapsing or evaporating into the surrounding hot gas.

'We're really excited by the new images, and they're just the beginning - there's lots more we can learn from the data,' Dr Crawford said.

The study also provides important clues about how black holes affect their surrounding environment.

The filaments are a by-product of a super-massive black hole at the core of the galaxy interacting with gases in the Perseus Cluster.

This immense black hole blows out bubbles of radio-wave emitting material into the Perseus Cluster.

In the wake of these bubbles, cold gas from the heart of the galaxy is also dragged out into long streams to form the filaments.

The observations were made by a team led by Professor Andy Fabian, from the Institute of Astronomy at the University of Cambridge using the Hubble Space Telescope Advanced Camera for Surveys.

The study will enable the team to interpret observations of similar networks of filaments in other, even more remote central cluster galaxies that cannot be observed in anything like the same detail as NGC 1275.

The Hubble telescope is due for its final refit this autumn, when its batteries and camera will be replaced by a team of astronauts from the Space Shuttle.

The new camera is said to be 90 times more powerful than the present one.

Big Ben, a herd of African elephants and a likeness of Scott of the Antarctic are some of the giant sculptures transforming a seaside resort today - all made entirely from sand.

Dedicated sand-artists are at Weston-super-Mare in Somerset this week recreating the world's best known-landmarks and faces on the famous beach.

Twelve experts in the medium are turning 360 tonnes of sand into iconic images from seven continents - including the Empire State Building complete with King Kong.
The lion sleeps tonight: The sand sculptures will be on show at the beach until August 31
Sand magic: A herd of African elephants are among the giant sculptures transforming the seaside resort today

The artists have until Saturday to finish their masterpieces in time for the opening of the Sand Sculpture Festival 2008.

Last year's event attracted 30,000 visitors and the organisers are expecting more this year.

Marketing manager Luci Hortop said: "The theme is 'Around the World'. For example there's Antarctica, featuring Scott of the Antarctic, and his team along with an ice-berg. Africa has a mud pool, elephants bathing and a lion stretching out in the sunshine.
Famous landmarks recreated: A sand-artist works the Big Ben sculptures before the opening of a sand sculpture festival in Weston-super-Mare, Somerset

"In Australasia there's Uluru (formerly Ayers Rock) and in Europe there's an eight-foot replica of Big Ben, built by the Italian artist Leonardo Ugolini."

Versions of Antoni Gaudi's cathedral in Barcelona and Venice's Rialto Bridge are also being created.

A 12-foot Empire State Building, straddled by King Kong, is under construction in the North America section, built by US sculptors Thomas Koet and Jill Smith.

There is no danger of the sandy masterpieces being ruined by Britain's unpredictable weather, as the works are sealed in with a strong lacquer.

Ms Hortop said: "They are protected by a protein-based solution almost like hairspray and can't be affected by the rain."

A 100 by 40-metre area of beach has been taken over by the event, which has a section reserved for children's sculptures.

South America and Asia are the other continents represented.

The sand sculptures will be on show at the beach until August 31.

Councillor Elfan Ap Rees of North Somerset Council said: "We are very lucky to be hosting this event yet again, which is a reflection of the superb sandcastle-building qualities of Weston beach of course.

"I certainly look forward to seeing the results once the build is completed and the designs unveiled."
Hard at work: Jill Smith from Florida, USA, working on her sand-sculpture of a Canadian ice hockey player

When you have too much free time on your hand and fame just isn’t coming your way, here’s one thing you can try: big the biggest thing that hasn’t gotten to the Guinness Record Book and enjoy some attention. Here are a few of the most useless biggest things we have come across

Spiralling off across the Nevada desert, these huge geometric shapes are an amazing three miles in diameter.

Created using only common garden implements and wooden sticks, the stunning creation is the most ambitious of many sand sculptures made by 47-year-old Jim Denevan.
True grit: US artist Jim Denevan walked in circles for more than 100 miles to make the massive piece of sand art in the Nevada Desert

Making three trips to Nevada's scorching Black Rock salt plain and taking a total of nine days, the Californian artist walked more than 100 miles scraping his designs onto the desert floor.

Denevan discovered his talent for sand art more than ten years ago when he idly picked up a stick and drew a 12ft long fish.

Since then he has created more than 600 sand drawings and walked at least 1,800 miles.
Optical illusion: Another sand picture appears to stand directly upright from the California beach where he drew it

'I just picked up a stick and started to make shapes,' he said. 'Before long I had covered the beach in animals, cars, volcanoes...you name it!'

A stranger later pointed out similarities between Denevan's work and Zen Buddhist gardens, suggesting the artist use a rake as his primary tool.

Denevan, who has exhibited his work in galleries, also compares Britain's complex crop circle shapes.

'They seem to be a bit more geometric than my designs and I guess they are planned in advance. I just turn up on the sand and start to create an image off the top of my head,' he said.

On beaches his work gets such a positive reaction that he has even found himself being told to leave it alone by strangers who don't realise he's the artist.

'I once finished a picture and was on my way home and realised that I had forgotten my jacket. When I went back, people on a cliff above the picture shouted at me to get off it. I had to shout back that it was me who had drawn it,' Denevan said.

But the temporary nature of the pieces is one of the attractions for him.

'I love to complete a piece just as the tide comes in so that in that moment it is finished and destroyed,' he added.

Sanju Bhagat's stomach was once so swollen he looked nine months pregnant and could barely breathe.
Living in the city of Nagpur, India, Bhagat said he'd felt self-conscious his whole life about his big belly. But one night in June 1999, his problem erupted into something much larger than cosmetic worry.

An ambulance rushed the 36-year-old farmer to the hospital. Doctors thought he might have a giant tumor, so they decided to operate and remove the source of the bulge in his belly.

"Basically, the tumor was so big that it was pressing on his diaphragm and that's why he was very breathless," said Dr. Ajay Mehta of Tata Memorial Hospital in Mumbai. "Because of the sheer size of the tumor, it makes it difficult [to operate]. We anticipated a lot of problems."

Mehta said that he can usually spot a tumor just after he begins an operation. But while operating on Bhagat, Mehta saw something he had never encountered. As he cut deeper into Bhagat's stomach, gallons of fluid spilled out -- and then something extraordinary happened.

"To my surprise and horror, I could shake hands with somebody inside," he said. "It was a bit shocking for me."


One doctor recalled that day in the operating room.

"He just put his hand inside and he said there are a lot of bones inside," she said. "First, one limb came out, then another limb came out. Then some part of genitalia, then some part of hair, some limbs, jaws, limbs, hair."

Inside Bhagat's stomach was a strange, half-formed creature that had feet and hands that were very developed. Its fingernails were quite long.

"We were horrified. We were confused and amazed," Mehta said.


At first glance, it may look as if Bhagat had given birth. Actually, Mehta had removed the mutated body of Bhagat's twin brother from his stomach. Bhagat, they discovered, had one of the world's most bizarre medical conditions -- fetus in fetu. It is an extremely rare abnormality that occurs when a fetus gets trapped inside its twin. The trapped fetus can survive as a parasite even past birth by forming an umbilical cordlike structure that leaches its twin's blood supply until it grows so large that it starts to harm the host, at which point doctors usually intervene.

According to Mehta, there are fewer than 90 cases of fetus in fetu recorded in medical literature.